Let’s get one thing straight: if you’re the kind of person who snaps at waiters, glares at cashiers, or throws a tantrum because your latte took an extra three minutes, you’re not just having a bad day—you’re an a$$hole.
I don’t care if you just came from church, a meditation retreat, or a f^%king TED Talk about kindness—if the moment you don’t get instant gratification, you turn into a demanding little s#*t, then all that talk about being a “good person” is worth about as much as a soggy napkin.
And you know who’s the worst about this? People who should know better—folks who preach kindness, humility, and patience, then immediately go full “WHAT’S TAKING YOU SO LONG?!” when their burger takes five extra minutes. I had lunch with a church staff (long story, don’t ask) and the pastor completely lost his s#t over a minor wait at a restaurant. A pastor. A guy whose entire job is about living out the “fruit of the spirit”—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, all that good stuff. And yet, the moment things didn’t go his way, that patience went straight out the f^%king window.
So let’s break this down:
- Why is it so hard for some people to be decent?
- What’s actually happening behind the scenes in service jobs?
- How can you make life easier for the people who serve you (and stop being an a$$hole in the process)?
Because honestly, it’s not that f^%king hard.
The Golden Rule, But Make It Basic
There’s a reason “treat others the way you want to be treated” is one of the oldest moral principles in history. It’s so f^%king obvious that we teach it to toddlers. And yet, somehow, fully grown adults forget it the second they step into a restaurant or store.
Let’s spell it out in case you need a refresher:
- The person serving you is a human being. They are not a robot. They are not a punching bag.
- Service jobs suck. They deal with rude customers, long hours, and usually make s#*t pay.
- Mistakes happen. You’re not the only customer. If your order is wrong, calmly ask for a fix.
- Patience is free. Screaming at a barista because your drink is taking “too long” makes you look like an absolute tool.
The bottom line? If you wouldn’t want someone treating you like a disposable inconvenience, don’t do it to them. It’s that f^%king simple.
The Reality of Service Work (a.k.a. S#*t You Don’t See)
Unless you’ve worked in retail, food service, or any customer-facing job, you probably have no idea how much B@ST@RD-ry goes on behind the scenes. So let’s break it down.
1. Your Server Is Not in Control of the Kitchen
If your food is taking longer than expected, guess what? It’s not the server’s fault. They’re not back there flipping your f^%king steak themselves. The kitchen might be backed up, understaffed, or dealing with a dozen other tables. Acting like your time is more important than everyone else’s just makes you look like a selfish d!ck.
2. Retail Workers Don’t Set the Prices or Policies
Stop yelling at the cashier because an item is overpriced or the store won’t take your expired coupon. They don’t make the rules—they’re just trying to do their job without getting chewed out by a manager for your B!+CHing.
3. Most Service Workers Are Underpaid and Overworked
These folks are on their feet all day, dealing with entitled customers, often for s#t wages and no benefits. You losing your mind over a minor inconvenience isn’t just obnoxious—it’s insulting*.
How Not to Be a Walking Pile of Entitlement
Wanna be a decent human? Here’s a guide, since apparently some people need it spelled out:
✅ Say “please” and “thank you.” It costs zero dollars to not be a d!ck.
✅ Tip well. If you can’t afford to tip, you can’t afford to eat out.
✅ Be patient. Your time is not more valuable than everyone else’s.
✅ Don’t take your bad mood out on them. They didn’t ruin your day—your attitude did.
✅ Acknowledge their effort. A simple “hey, I appreciate you” can make someone’s day.
FAQ (a.k.a. “Are You Seriously Asking This?”)
“But what if my service is actually bad?”
Then address it like an adult, not a spoiled toddler. Calmly let them know the issue and give them a chance to fix it. Screaming solves nothing.
“I’m paying for a service. Shouldn’t I expect perfection?”
Sure, and in a perfect world, every server would have eight arms and psychic abilities. In this world, humans make mistakes.
“What if they’re rude to me first?”
One bad interaction doesn’t justify being a B!+CH to everyone. Handle it with grace, or better yet, just leave.
“Why should I tip when the restaurant should just pay them more?”
Because in the U.S., servers literally rely on tips to survive. Until the system changes, don’t be the d!ck who punishes them for it.
Your Character Is Showing—Make It a Good One
Here’s the deal: how you treat service workers says everything about you. It doesn’t matter how much you donate to charity, how many inspirational quotes you post, or how many times you show up to church—if you turn into an entitled prick the second someone is paid to serve you, then all that “goodness” is fake as f^%k.
So, be kind. Be patient. And for f^%k’s sake, don’t be a d!ck.